I went to yoga this morning. It was not the regular teacher, it was raining, I was exhausted, but I hauled my butt into the studio anyway. Hot yoga is the perfect place to let the tears stream down your face, because they intertwine with all of the sweat and maybe – so long as I can control my jagged sob-filled breathing – no one knows the difference. Even though I know all of the queues in this class, the substitute teacher, speaking with an accent, distracted me, held my attention and kept me out of my head a bit. She was amazingly supportive to me, even though I’m sure she didn’t know it. Some days I push my body to the limits in what feels like a fire from within, burning down everything that I am, to emerge as someone else when I walk out of the studio. Someone far less broken than I really am. Other days, like today, every pose is softer, not at all my full expression. It’s a gentle approach, but it’s really just getting through all of the pain in my body without pushing into that fire, that on other days feels like liberation, but today feels like death. At the end of class though, as we settled into savasana, this song, Where’s My Love, by SYML started playing on the teacher’s playlist. It was the instrumental version, heavy with cello. I used to be obsessed with this song. I have a playlist that includes every version of this song, and nothing else. I have listened to it over and over and over. But I haven’t heard it in months, until today. This song is everything that I love: piano, cello, deep emotion. It fits right in with all of the other music I normally listen to. If you like this, if it brings up all the feelings for you, too, I urge you to check out more by @symlmusic , @sleepingatlast , @ironandwinetour , and more (link in bio). Some would describe it all as too sad, but I think it’s perfect. Besides, I recently read that “If you are lucky enough to feel sad, well, savor it while it lasts – if only because it means that you care about something in this world enough to let it under your skin.” From The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows by John Koenig #justcomehome #sad @yogapodboulderlongmont
